Blog 12/14
Living in a new country with immigrant parents can be sometimes intoxicating. They have their expectations of me and especially with the opportunities that I have, I'm expected to achieve and thrive in ways that they couldn't.
Reading The Best We Could Do by Thi Bui, I felt a sort of connection because she also struggled under her parent's expectations. While reading, at first, I felt like the expectations of our parents were too much, putting too much pressure and not considering the stress it causes. Towards the end of the book, I actually feel, I guess, understanding of how they became to be like that and why. I knew that parents just want the best for us but I always considered our efforts and our feelings before their's. I realized their pressure was just a mixture of their regret, hope, and worry about my safety. We see this in the book when the Bui family was in the midst of the fire in her apartment, her "refugee instinct" helped her to survive and evacuate her family. In a way, the things that she deemed pressure, expectations, trauma, helped her survive. I think this shows how parents really just only think about the best things for you and even though their actions can come across harshly, it's for me in the end.
I think it's a choice we have to make one day: to ignore the hidden intentions of our parents or accept that they made mistakes but always wanted the best for you. Knowing this would bring peace and freedom to all of us and potentially end the cycle that they have been living in.
I like that your blog suggests the high expectations and pressure from immigrant parents, which often appear harsh, are fundamentally rooted in their past trauma
ReplyDeleteYour blog helped me relate to you more, my parents are also immigrants so while reading the book i was also able to feel this connection. I also loved reading about how you talk about how immigrant parents do things to the best interest of their children. You really summed up your blog well by saying how we have to make a choice as immigrants.
ReplyDeleteI really like how you ended off by saying "Knowing this would bring peace and freedom to all of us and potentially end the cycle that they have been living in." This line gave me a different way to look at life and at my immigrant parents who have always done everything for me.
ReplyDeleteI completely relate and agree with you on how our parents could expect too much from us, but ultimately they just want the best for us. I also really like how you connected your own life with the book. This was a great blog!
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